Panarin’s Disintegration: USA ends in 2010

Russian professor Igor Panarin, reportedly a very affable guy, is brightening the new year for his countrymen and women with his theory about the U.S.

Referred to as Panarin’s Disintegration, it predicts the dissolution of the U.S. in 2010.

According to the Wall Street Journal, Panarin, a former KGB analyst well known in the Kremlin, foresees mass immigration, economic collapse, and moral decline leading to a civil war in the U.S. next fall. The western states will fall under Chinese influence, the eastern states will go to Europe, the north central states to Canada, and the south to Mexico. Alaska reverts to Russian control and Hawaii to southeast Asia.

This is the result, according to Panarin:

panarin

It’s easy to see how such a prediction would make Panarin a popular figure in today’s Russia. It is very reminiscent of the 1950s and ’60s when Premier Nikita Khrushchev often boasted, “We will bury you.” We all know how that turned out.

Looking at the map, I’d have to say Russia can have Alaska back as long as they take Sarah Palin. And knowing what I do about the Southwest, I think Arizona will go to Mexico, not China. There’s also a great deal of Hispanic influence and influx here in Colorado, but I’m pleased to see Panarin put us in the Canadian bloc, where there’s likely to be a better economic future. Most of my family lives in Oklahoma, however, and I’m concerned about that; I’ll have to write to Panarin and ask about border fences. If mass immigration is going to contribute to the Disintegration, he surely must have something in mind to control it in the future.

Okay, everybody, you’ve been warned. If you don’t like your assignment, you’d better start planning your move today. In this market, it’s going to take a while to get that house sold and find a new job.

8 thoughts on “Panarin’s Disintegration: USA ends in 2010

  1. Hmm….interesting, but far fetched. Although major changes may occur, I can’t imagine those neighboring countries actually coming in and splitting us up like postwar Germany. Canada wouldn’t make a move. They’ve got plenty of land and natural resources, why the hell would they want to deal with our population? Mexico’s society is in a much much worse condition than ours, with poverty, corruption, and gang violence. They are in no condition of invading the U.S. with their military. IMO, the greatest foreign threat we face is from Russia, through their desired alliances with our enemies: Iran, Venezuela, and Cuba. (As much as I despise imperialism, sometimes I think that our leaders should have followed Patton’s advice after WWII and attempted to crush Russia then and there, to avoid the 60 years of standoffs that haven’t really done much to quell the threat of a Russian attack on the U.S.)

    But…I don’t think foreign intervention will cause the demise of the republic. Rather, I think the Government will never be paid back for these insane “bailouts” and go completely bankrupt. This will be followed by massive civil unrest and food riots, in which the President will have no choice but to declare martial law in most major cities and send the Army in to put down the unrest. Congress will hand over a military dictatorship to the executive branch as the only means to save the United States. Our republic was based on that of Rome, our empire is based on that of Rome, and our future outlook will be much the same as Rome

    [Cheery outlook, eh? And of course we all know how the Roman Empire ended — morally bankrupt, rotted from the inside out, and eventually absorbed by other countries. Khrushchev bet we’d end that way and lost the bet. I don’t know why Panarin thinks it will be any different this time.]

  2. Yeah, that’s more like it Adam. A nation doesn’t split in 1,2,3, it won’t take such a rush.

    [True, Panarin does seem to be suffering from a severe case of instant gratification.]

  3. Bring on the universal health care, German cars, British comedy, French food, and Italian men! Sigh…I TOLD my sister not to move to Florida.

    [But at least she’ll get to eat burritos on the beach.]

  4. LOL on the Russia taking Palin! Maybe that’s how she came up with all those weird names for her 27 children?? They’re Russky names!

    As a citizen of the future Atlantic America, I vote to go with Canada. Also, I think that since I’m beating the balloting rush, my vote should count as ten million votes, especially if we’re under martial law. 🙂

    [All I know is when the breakup occurs, I don’t want to get stuck anywhere near Sarah Palin. I see absolutely no good coming from hanging around that woman.]

  5. I heard a little about this story before, but I hadn’t realized the extent of the nonsense here. This guy is completely full of it.

    First off, China hasn’t shown any interest in expanding and aquiring new territory. If they were going to do so, they’d more likely take it from Siberia. It’s easier, it’s closer and less populated.

    Second, I have a tough time imagining any crisis that results in a “civil war” in the USA. Even the Great Depression didn’t bring one, though we were close.

    As to one of the previous commenters:

    But…I don’t think foreign intervention will cause the demise of the republic. Rather, I think the Government will never be paid back for these insane “bailouts” and go completely bankrupt. This will be followed by massive civil unrest and food riots, in which the President will have no choice but to declare martial law in most major cities and send the Army in to put down the unrest. Congress will hand over a military dictatorship to the executive branch as the only means to save the United States. Our republic was based on that of Rome, our empire is based on that of Rome, and our future outlook will be much the same as Rome

    Never. Gonna. Happen. The Roman Republic was built on an even shakier foundation than the USA and didn’t have any of the constitutional safeguards we have now. There’s no precedent at all for “food riots”, whatever those are, and as far as I’m aware there’s never been any declaration of martial law in the USA, except in some small areas of the country bordering the CSA during the Civil War.

    Now, that said, why wouldn’t the government be paid back? This crisis is bad, sure, but it’s not 1929 and it’s not nearly as severe as the crisis then was. Besides, the government could cover the costs of the bailouts within a couple years by cutting the military in half. Not likely, I’ll admit, but not impossible either.

    The country recovered and we went on to do quite well. I’ve no doubt that by the end of 2010, far from this nation destroying itself, we’ll be better and more stable than we’ve been in a long time.

    [I must admit I prefer your assessment to Adam’s and Panarin’s. Since it’s out of my hands anyway, I’d like to believe I’m on relatively solid ground.]

  6. First, someone said “Canada wouldn’t make a move.” Well it’s true that we (Canada) don’t need to take anything, Canada would take as much as possible, especially the U.S. Virgin Islands and Puerto Rico, which aren’t mentioned. Canada would take the Central North-American Republic because it would improve the economy and lessen the growth of China, but mainly because under China and Mexico, the quality of life would drop, meaning that the Central North-American Republic, upon realizing the choice between Mexico, China and Canada, would choose to join Canada, just like how during the end of World War 2, many Germans surrendered to the allies in the west, preferring to be assimilated by the merciful west than slaughtered and raped by the vicious soviets in the east.
    Now, the OP expressed concerns about family living in the projected Texas Republic, and the possibility of a border fence. I doubt that a border fence would be a problem, as Canada’s not stupid enough to blow a fortune building one. As for whether you’ll be able to see your Oklahoman family, I don’t know for sure, but I do have a prediction. First, due to Canada’s immigration policy, American refugees will be accepted in Canada. Second, it would probably be easiest for Canada to offer citizenship to all American citizens. It may cost a lot of money, but it’d probably be easiest to set it up so that anyone with an American citizenship would be able to go to a local government office and exchange their paperwork for Canadian paperwork, and their to prevent all Americans being horribly poor due to the fact that the US dollar will obviously be next to worthless, but US money from these new Canadian citizens at par ($1US for $1Canadian). I really think the hardest part would be pushing the former Americans towards the left wing (so Canada doesn’t suddenly become flooded with people that are farther right than our conservative party), and getting rid of all the guns (Canada will not grant you the right to bear arms.)
    Getting back to the US Virgin Islands and Puerto Rico. No Canadian in their right mind would say no to at least one tropical paradise. We’ll take Guantanamo Bay, too – turn it into a beach resort- but we’re not taking your prisoners.
    Just one thing, I don’t think that the 15 states that would join Canada would remain states – Canada is a single nation, not a confederation. Either they’d be divided between British Columbia, Alberta, Saskatchewan, Manitoba, and Ontario (probably by straight, vertical lines), or they’d become one or two big provinces, or a combination. They’d probably become new provinces so that they don’t unbalance the current demographics, but I’d still like to see the great rectangle that is Saskatchewan become even longer.

... and that's my two cents