Frontside grab … truck driver … frontside rodeo … cab double underflip … quad cork 1800 … half cab quadruple backflip … backside triple cork 1620 …

Snowboarding tricks, many of them being done today during the 2017 X-Games in Aspen, Colo. Amazing to watch even when you don’t understand a word of the jargon. It makes you realize how far from your youth you’ve come, how wide the gap has grown. Yes, they do seem to be speaking English most of the time, but it’s certainly not a vocabulary I learned.

So I just marvel at the tricks and chuckle at the jargon. When the kids (they’re all kids to me) are doing stuff that’s never been done before, in a sport that didn’t exist when I was their age, they have to invent a new language to describe it. Logical. But I’m still cringing after this exchange during one young woman’s run (snowboard slopestyle event):

Commentator #1: She’s on fire. Literally.

Commentator #2: Literally.

Commentator #1: Literally.

The first time was bad enough. But three times in a row!? Ugh! I don’t care if dictionaries are starting to accept this misuse of the word … not because it’s now correct but because the majority of the population persists in using it incorrectly. In this context, it’s wrong.

Well, call me a pedantic old woman but I’m not ready to throw in the towel. The two announcers should have settled for the metaphor “She’s on fire.” Period. But they didn’t, and I wanted to run in and smack them with a fire extinguisher. Literally.