Not everyone is delighted with the attractions we Coloradans cherish. (Twenty years after moving here, I’m still excited to call myself a Coloradan.) For example, here are a few widely circulated comments gleaned from Google reviews*:
Pikes Peak: “Scary horrible experience […] It feels like you may die, due to the lack of guard rails. The views are pretty, but much better when not scared for your life. […] I haven’t looked up the death toll from this yet. One entire family was stranded on the mountain due to burning up their clutch. I wouldn’t recommend,” 1 star, Maria M.
As I’ve reported in the past, the lack of guard rails is necessary so that plows can push snow off the road. And the only reports of deaths I could find were the seven that happened during the annual Pikes Peak International Hill Climb up the mountain. However, I am not without sympathy, given my experience on Mt. Evans.
Great Sand Dunes National Park: “We thought this would be a fun family trip. Sand got everywhere. It was super hot, and we couldn’t find a single refreshment stand. Cell phone coverage was horrible,” 1 star, Jeffery F.
Imagine that. Sand at the Sand Dunes.
Garden of the Gods: “The views are amazing, the 19th century ban on alcohol is absolutely ridiculous,” 1 star, Micah P.
Sorry, dude. Most people can enjoy amazing views — all natural, even — without alcohol.
Mesa Verde National Park: Went here, but couldn’t enter the park too far as I have a great fear of drop-offs!!! So if you have a fear of heights and roads with sheer drop offs right at the side of your car… don’t attempt this park,” – Debbie B.
Well, she does have a point. On the other hand, what did she expect?
Red Rocks Park and Amphitheatre: “Went to get a funnel cake well before the end of the concert and was told the concession stand is closed. He sent me across the plaza to another food stand and they said they don’t make funnel cakes and are also closed,” 1 star, Nick M.
This guy obviously wasn’t there the night of the recent hailstorm.
And my favorite:
Rocky Mountain National Park: “Too many rocks! Too many mountains! The mountains were too big. Didn’t see any wildlife. A total lack of fast food options,” 1 star, Alex F.
Sarcasm, perhaps? But funny, nonetheless.
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*Selections from “10 reviews left by unhappy tourists in Colorado,” Out There Colorado, Oct. 4, 2022, by Spencer McKee
Image: Dream Lake and Hallett Peak, Rocky Mountain National Park (Matt Dirksen/Getty Images)
Pissed meself laughing !! People can be astonishing: not only do they have ludicrous expectations, but they post about how their idiocy wasn’t favoured !!
I can’t leave this one without addressing you by my nickname for you, Colorado – I mean, can I ?!! [grin]
You can call me by that beautiful name as much as you want. I love it. You stated it well — people downgrading a place because it didn’t somehow change itself to accommodate their personal needs and preferences.
I loved these so much! “Sand everywhere!” And “too many rocks!”
“Too many rocks … ” cracks me up every time I read it.
Weird people, but the funnel cake might be a legit complaint … 😉
I really can’t comment on funnel cakes at Red Rocks because I’ve never experienced either. (Yes, I’m probably the only person in the Denver metro who’s never been to Red Rocks.)